Daughter’s Dilemma
Sarah
Earnestly staring at the man I had been considered a father for several years, he sat on the couch, meeting my gaze without emotion.
“Is it true that you insulted Lila and Margarette last night? Your name-Sarah Benner-is plastered across every social media platform and gossip blog in the country because of your little outburst.” Dad paused, then looked at his assistant, who continued.
“Miss, this social blog claims you bullied Sarah Benner, who was actually Miss Lila pretending to be you. Of course, no one knew you were the real Sarah Benner, but people say Benner managed to let it go.”
Of course, why would someone let slap Sarah Benner? But why does it seem like it’s my fault?
“You are tarnishing your own name! No, my name! How am I supposed to explain to people that there’s nothing to worry about?”
I understood what my father was getting at.
“They’re using my identity!” I interjected, my voice rising with each word. “She’s parading around as Sarah Benner!”
Philip’s and my father’s faces darkened. I saw Philip clench his fists and grind his teeth, but he held back, fearing being called useless. I was sure the blame would fall on me.
“You shouldn’t have confronted Lila publicly!” he roared. “Sarah, you’ve had every advantage-the best schools, the finest tutors, and years of etiquette training! You’ve been under the Benner roof, enjoying our protection and privilege. Surely, you know better than anyone how to handle sticky situations with grace and tact!”
My lips pressed together. I felt hurt as I looked at him. Gathering all my courage, I replied, “I did think properly; I did exactly what you taught me to do! You taught me never to let anyone disrespect or use me! Well, your new wife is using my name, my identity!”
A harsh laugh escaped my father’s lips. “Why does it matter now? Because suddenly the perks of being a Benner are important to you? Now that someone else is playing the role you neglected, it seems like you’ve awakened to reality!”
“It wasn’t like that!” I trembled with anger. “I am the real Sarah Benner! My name is important to me!”
“Don’t make me laugh! That is the truth, deep inside! You threw away your name for years! Remember that you are borrowing your name from me-Benner! You’re just like your mother-nothing but an opportunistic user!”
Trembling with rage, my father’s words about my mother felt like poison on his lips, thickening the air in the room with suffocating tension.
Philip couldn’t take it anymore. “You have no right to insult my wife, especially since you have no relation to each other!”
Tightening my grip on Philip’s arm, I sought to calm him down while giving him a quiet warning glance.
Dad’s eyes narrowed to slits, his gaze shifting between Philip and me.
“So, it’s true. You married the president of Luminary Productions!” He let out a bitter chuckle; his disgust for Philip was evident in every line of his face. “I also heard you’re already divorced… at twenty-one? You’re proving that your actions show you lack judgment and direction! All you do is run! You keep doing things that Sarah Benner shouldn’t do!”
Tears streamed down my face.
“I ran away so that you and Amir wouldn’t be hurt! Yes, I admit I used Philip’s marital status! But what choice did I have? My mother had just died, and you blamed me for everything! At seventeen, I had to analyze, plan, and prepare everything alone for my life! You rejected me! And even now… even now, you despise me because I’m another man’s child!”
My chest tightened painfully as the memories flooded back.
“It’s not my fault my mom was kidnapped! It’s not my fault I’m someone else’s child!” I said through gritted teeth as I reopened wounds that had never truly healed.
“Even if you don’t say it outright, I know you blame me because you can’t direct your anger at my mom! I was left behind, her perfect resemblance! That’s why you’re so angry with me!”
“Get. Out!” Dad’s voice was dark and dangerous. His face darkened as he turned away, facing the window-a clear sign that he was ending our conversation.
I knew he hated being reminded of the past, which was why he kept his distance from me-an undeniable proof that my mother had a child with another man.
“Dad, are you really cutting me out of your life?” I asked, desperately seeking answers so I could move on.
He didn’t answer. He remained facing away. Philip held my hand, sensing I was about to collapse.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.
“I won’t forget that this is the second time you’ve pushed me out of your life! And this is also the second time I’ll declare my love for you despite everything.”
He glanced at me with indifference.
“I am Sarah Benner! That is my identity! If you want to treat Lila like a daughter, do it properly! You weren’t even sure if that mother and daughter could be trusted! You know that about yourself! Now, I’ll have to apologize if they get hurt in the process. I’m not backing down!”
His assistant trembled. “Miss, it’s better if you leave…”
Unable to hold back my tears, I left the suite and sobbed in Philip’s arms.
Philip’s expression darkened, his jaw clenching as he held me. The intensity of my emotions overwhelmed me until I struggled to breathe.
“Philip!” I held onto his arm tightly, fingers gripping his sleeve as I struggled to breathe. Panic surged in my chest, making it even harder to get air. “Philip, p-please, t-take me to Josh!”
In the grip of overwhelming emotions, I had forgotten about my pregnancy and the need to be cautious. The intensity of it all-the confrontation, the rejection, the fear-caused me to lose consciousness.
“S-Sarah!” I heard Philip’s voice as darkness enveloped me. “Damn it!”
When I woke up, I found myself in the hospital ward, unsure of how much time had passed.
Silently, I stared at the ceiling, tracing the patterns in the acoustic tiles while attempting to piece together what had happened.
“Babe…” Philip kissed my hand, visibly shaken by anger, fear… or something else. I couldn’t tell. Suddenly, I wondered if this had anything to do with my pregnancy.
“Tell me the baby is okay…” I whispered, my free hand moving instinctively to my stomach.
“You and the baby are healthy,” he assured me, squeezing my hand gently. “I’m restricting your activities, Sarah, and that’s final. It’s for your own good.”
I nodded, knowing Philip was right. But little did I realize then that Philip had unresolved feelings about Josh.
***
Philip
As I reflect on Sarah’s relationship with Josh, a heavy stone weighs on my chest.
At first, Sarah begged me not to let Josh get suspended, revealing a deep connection I hadn’t noticed. It stung even more knowing Josh had supported Sarah through panic attacks-attacks I had triggered.
During my coma, Josh was by Sarah’s side, helping her find me. When Sarah fainted upon meeting her dad, her first words were, “Philip, p-please, t-take me to Josh!”
Struggling to decipher my emotions, I wondered if it was just jealousy or something more profound, tightening my fist.
Maybe Sarah didn’t realize yet how much she was hurting me.
So, this is what heartache felt like…
Yet, I had no right to demand anything, not after what I’d done to her.
Suppressing my feelings, I declared, “I’ll ensure those who hurt you suffer, my love… that’s a promise!”
Four months later, the news of Sarah and I expecting twins filled me with joy-until a video broke the internet, showing Sarah engaged in a sexual act with Josh…