the miserable life of a miserable teenager

When I stumbled across a disorder that stuck in my mind.

Borderline Personality DisorderThis is from NôvelDrama.Org.

Every trait sounded like my everyday life; fear of abandonment, unstable relationships, identity disturbance, impulsivity, recurrent suicidal thoughts or behaviour, effective instability (unstable moods), chronic feeling of emptiness, explosive anger and transient stress induced paranoid (under stress, become dissociated and paranoid, believing conspiracies.)

Sounds like every session with my therapist.

I feel almost happy I caught it, but now what? I am living with a disorder.

Yes, I finally know it’s not who I am, but it’s in my mind, I still don’t have control.

Just because I know the traits, doesn’t make them disappear.

I love that I can put it under a label people can google, so they’re not blind to my ways. It makes everything easier, but not easy.

Oh yeah, right on time.

Chronic emptiness.